A Soft Girl Summer’s Checklist

By Definition

The "Hot Girl Summer" is a cultural term that gained popularity in recent years, coined by the rapper Megan Thee Stallion. It's all about embracing confidence, independence, and having fun during the summer months. It's about feeling empowered to be yourself, to live life to the fullest, and to prioritize your own happiness and well-being. It's not limited to any specific activities but often involves socializing, enjoying good music, flaunting your style, and embracing a carefree attitude. The term has resonated with many people as a celebration of self-love, self-expression, and living life on your own terms.

During my trip to see my Mom for her birthday, I was thinking ahead and putting some plans in place for the Summer. As of now, I have one family vacation and one girls trip scheduled for summer 2024. Both of which are late into the summer months. From May through July, there isn’t anything on my agenda. But, I live in ATL so technically, my summer is booked lol! Between the day party’s, themed events, solo dating, actual dates (which have been bleak lately) and exploring new places; I’m not worried about not having fun this summer.

To me, with the understanding of what a Hot Girl Summer is, there at two aspects that come to mind. One is to Live Unapologetically by embracing their authenticity selves on their own terms without fear of judgment. While the other aspect is to Embrace one’s Sensuality and Sexuality through exploring and expressing your desires in a safe and consensual manner without shame. For me, I am on a journey to build self love, self awareness, self acceptance and accountability. A hot girl summer, isn’t an aspect that matches my lifestyle. A lifestyle of intentional exclusivity, is one of not allowing myself to endulgh into activities that steer me away from a relationship with God. For this summer my peace is a priority and I find peace by through a routine of clarity. Here is my checklist of how I intend to maintain this peace for the summer.

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The Checklist

1. Fashion and Style: My mom and I went shopping for almost 3 days straight while I was in New Jersey for her birthday party. Stores like Marshall’s , TJMaxx, Nordstrom Rack and even Ross all had trending universal staple and statement pieces for the Summer. Most of these styles I’ve seeing in designer stores ranging from $250 to $450 per item. While we were shopping in the stores, I came across items in a price range of $15-$79 where the materials, fabrication and stitching were nearly exact. Fashion isn’t style. Understanding your personal style and creating your version of a clean girl/ soft girl fashion aesthetic whether it is edgy, conservative, boho feminine or androgynous. It’s the understanding that it’s not about the price tag but about how you put the pieces together that complement your personality and your physique. With this I intend to increase my wardrobe with affordable fashion pieces that can extend overtime and work from day, events to evening events and quick weekend trips for the summer.

2. Beauty and Self-Care: Skincare practices take time and effort. Finding products that enhance my melanin without any irritation is a process. I am truly a Kiehl’s Skincare kinda girlie. But this glass skin from Korean beauty techniques are peaking an interest. It promotes healthy, glowing from within, radiant skin. I am a true Kiehl’s girlie and love embracing, clean, fragrance, free light skin care products. For the next upcoming weeks, I will be exploring more to continue products that are designed to tailor to my melanin-rich skin. Over the past few years I have not been focused on what brand I use in my hair. Lately however my hair has been very dry which could be a result of using products that does not promote moisture for my natural hair. After researching hair care tips for maintaining moisture and defining natural curls without drying my hair out, I’ve been coming across products that have organic and clean ingredients. For instance, I love a good wash and go but I can’t stand using Eco style gel. This gel may allow my curls to be defined but causes breakage and brittleness. Making my own gel has been a very rewarding journeying. Now if you don’t have time to make the product and store it, at least take the time to research brands that provide similar results. The main focus is to invest in elevating and enhancing your natural features while embracing your soft girl aesthetics.

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3. Mindfulness and Wellness: Incorporating self-care practices that prioritize mental and emotional well-being, such as journaling, meditation, and setting boundaries to promote balance and inner peace during the summer months. You don’t have to go to every event this summer. The power of No goes a very long way. Sometimes staying in and creating an intimate setting for yourself is so peaceful. Don’t be afraid to send time alone to embrace your emotions while prioritizing your quiet time. I always suggest writing down your thoughts. Whether it’s numbers, phrases, a letter to yourself or bulletin points; release it on paper carries so much weight. That weight is then lifted off your shoulders to redirect that energy to something greater. Your mental health and well being matters.

4. Community and Connection: Emphasizing the importance of building and nurturing supportive communities, whether online or offline, that celebrate and uplift the experiences and voices of women embracing the soft girl lifestyle. Your circle of friends are very important. The saying is true, show me your friends and I’ll tell you who you are. It’s about being equally yoked. Having a community who understands and helps you build your goals genuinely without seeking something in return. You all should have similar aspirations and collectively work towards them. If not, you might want to re-evaluate your circle. Prime example, my circle of friends consist of 4 people. I can be my authentic self around them.

Long Story Short

In the bustling symphony of life, there comes a time when the discord of chaos begins to fade, gradually replaced by the soothing melodies of tranquility. Embracing the soft life is similar to sinking into your favorite spot on the couch with a arm cup of tea after a long day of work. It's the feeling of warm sunlight streaming through a window, casting a golden glow of serenity on your face. It's about slowing down, allowing ourselves to savor the sweetness of existence, and finding joy in life's simplest pleasures.

In a world that often glorifies hustle and ambition, embracing the soft life can feel like a radical act of self-care. It's a conscious choice to prioritize our well-being over the relentless pursuit of success, to cultivate moments of quietude amidst the noise of modernity. It's about creating space for ourselves to breathe, to rest, and to reconnect with the essence of who we are. At the heart of the soft life lies a profound appreciation for the beauty of everyday moments. It's about finding delight in the gentle rhythm of a morning cup of coffee, the soothing embrace of a loved one's laughter, or the tranquil stillness of a starlit night sky. Embracing the soft life also requires us to release the burdens of expectation and perfection. It's about embracing our flaws and imperfections, understanding that they are an integral part of what makes us human. It's about letting go of the need to constantly strive for more, and instead, learning to find contentment in the abundance of what we already have.

It's about recognizing that true wealth lies not in the size of our bank accounts, but in the richness of our relationships, the depth of our experiences, and the authenticity of our connections with the world around us. Embracing the soft life is also a journey of self-discovery and inner exploration. It's about delving into the depths of our own souls, uncovering the hidden truths that lie dormant. It's about embracing vulnerability, allowing ourselves to be seen and heard in our most authentic state.

So let us embrace the soft life with open arms, and let us revel in the sweetness of its embrace. For in the softness of life, we discover the true essence of our being, and in its embrace, we find the peace and fulfillment we've been searching for all along.